Struggle is the Enemy.

I'm scared.

That I'll never get another innocent, young love.

I'm terrified,

of the fact that I only have a few real friends left.

RM, MM, BS, MP.

I mean sure, theres other people that know everything,

and that haven't judged me.

But only four people that I'm really close to.

RM

We had a great talk earlier, and I'm so happy.

Me- We only have one weekend left before summer.

You- Yeah? What do you mean?

Me- This year went by fast.

You- Yeah...

Me- I'm scared.

You- What for?

Me- You seem like you hate all your ex-girlfriends. You are a jerk to all of them.

You- They all turned out to be bitches..

Me- Well every girl is a bitch when they're upset.

You- But you seem different. You are a lot cooler and way more real, if

that makes sense. But thats just the way I am. If someone acts like that

toward me, I'll act the same way back. I'm only a jerk if they're a bitch first.

Me- Oh. I get it.

You- Yeah, that was random. Where did that come from?

Me- Idk haha. BM and DM both don't want to be going out over the summer.

You- Wait, so you want to break up before summer..?

Me- Noooo. I was scared you wanted to.

You- Well, I don't (:

Me- Okay. (:

You- Is that cool with you?

Me- Yes, of course (:

No matter what happens, I hope you don't tell anyone anything.

Like about Friday.

Ahhh.

You are a lot better than the old secret. Way better.

MM

You are truly my best friend.

I love you like a brother, I really do.

I'm so glad I have you.

You are unlike anyone I know.

No matter how mad you get at someone,

you continue respecting them.

You always know the right thing to say,

its insane.

I'm so happy we are so close.

BS

I'm so happy we decided to tell each other our secrets.

I feel like we've started a new friendship.

Anyways,

I'm glad I have you to talk to, when it seems like noone else understands.

I know you will always understand.

MP

Best friends. <3

GB has been a big help, but I don't feel like we are that close. I can't tell her

a lot of things that I can tell others, who have actually done it.

I can't tell her that I didn't regret it for a long time.

And some other stuff, that I'm too afraid to admit to myself.

Ugh.

DM is great too, I'm glad I can talk to her.

I can believe she did the nasty though... Two nights ago.

Ahh.

Anyways, I can trust her with everything,

its just that we aren't that good of friends.

We get bored with each other.

idon'tknow.

I want to fall into a deep sleep,

and wake up in 3-4 months, when its time for school again.

Hopefully, by then, it will all be over. </3

I'm broken.